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DAY1 : unproductivity at its peak


I wish I could have ended the day on a better note .everything was less then good but its fine , better than my normal days . I woke up early , delayed then the scheduled time . Then I went to park for a walk and some exercise .i saw some usual faces , everyone heated up , and some creeps. sometimes I wonder how these people wake up so early ,just to watch people doing their stuff in park . Well let them do what they want .There are already so many people on this planet ,who can't live without putting peple in a box , better if i do't join their community. the best thing one can do is ignore them and don't let such people disturb your mental peace. i went park from one route and returned by another because of one of such creep . oh man , I don't to remember , his gaze is so weird and creepy.

Then I came home , did some and more breakfast, eggs and fruits. Good enough , while surfing youtube . yeah i should not done that , especially when I am trying to be productive and stay out of distractions. I should not done that again. Then I started studying , I done that till noon , and then a break , back to studies and it's lunch time . By 4:00pm , I should get back to my time table but here I am trying to take a break , which is never gonna end , today! I wonder sometimes how can a person take so much break wihout doing anything at first place . I have watched almost every video on youtube , like seriously, okai enough to get bored , but naah how could I , i wasted 2 hours surfing youtube and then guss what , I slept . exactly how can someone sleep so much . This makes me wonder on my well being.


I am literally sleeping so much , despite the fact I am insomniatic. Am I depress? DO being depress will change anything ? Is depression really the problem ? or am I just ignoring some basic facts ? IS anyone waiting for me to get up to start their work ? nope , noone .Noone here wait for anyone. They will just call you lazy , unproductive , shameful, unresourceful, problematic or a mistake. They will try to label you with some socially excepted neche , where noone actually belongs , Or some will come to show sympathy as if it's so bad to be like this , as if how low we have fallen be show emapthy . And here comes the interesting thing , these are the days when you really got to know people. but don't focus on what they say , cause these thing doesn't define you . as TAYLOR SWIFT says " you are not the opinion of someone who doesn't know you" (oh lorad , i love her!)

See you are not your bad days .It's ok if you had been less caring , less happy , less productive yesterday , everyone be there at some moment in their lifes. even if they don't wanna agree , but this is where you can learn .No matter how bad your last night was , or how pathetic you are this morning , no matter how many times you screwed up this afternoon , I believe you can shine , you can shine brightly ,with no shame . Unapologetically to the people who think you are unworthy .



See the darkness , acknowledge it , praise it for it's emptiness , love it bcause noone does ,beshadow sometimes to get it's taste but never let it's captivity reach your golden heart .You made a mistake , acknowledge it , make fun of it , but learn .Never let the mistake define you . You are not your past or future. YOU are YOU. You are worthy of everything you ever desire. Keep going !!

I WILL MEET YOU AT THE TOP!!!!

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